Tuesday, April 15

It will just take a minute

I like to think of myself as a sort of street-justice vigilante from time to time. I don't know where I got the notion so deeply in my head that things have to be fair all the time, but it's definitely an idea that isn't going anywhere soon. Wherever there is injustice I feel the need to right any wrongs, no-matter how insignificant they may be! And street-justice on the internet, let's face it, it can't get more insignificant. Perfect example:

I am helping my buddy Andrea look for free furniture and stuff on craigslist out in Calgary since she wants to move there. Naturally I go back to my city to check out of someone has potted plants I like or whatever crap, because I dig window-shopping so much I'll even do it with things already in other people's houses. So I come across this ad... selling a Window Style Framed Mirror with Shutters for $125. Advertised as a unique piece that really needs to be seen! I agree it needs to be seen, in my livingroom, because I fucking have one; it's called the India Mirror and I bought it at JYSK for 79.99!!!!!

What a great idea, I should go buy some shit from Home Sense and sell it as Indiana Jones' personal items from his trip to the Sahara Desert. It comes with a stamp that says "Made in China" and ... a CURSE! When you look into the mirror, your exact reflection looks back at you!
Obviously I am going to write an ad to let people know where they can buy this really unique item for a lot less money... ya, I'm one of THOSE people. Not the person who has to constantly "speak up" at every possible occasion like in the grocery store, or if someone cuts me off or anything like that. It's more stuff like this that someone has to be out of their goddamn mind to try and get away with, uhh like selling shards of glass that cures aids, or picking on someone in a coma. That stuff honestly bothers me! I guess if I really wanted to make a difference I could always fashion myself a cape with a big IN for INJUSTICE and walk around town listening to other people's conversations. That might be cool for a while. The bummer would be my Hero catchphrase wouldn't be awesome like "Look out, Radioactive Man!" but more like..

"Wait, I hear someone is being stupid somewhere...
Hold my coffee, I'll be back in a minute"

Edit: just got an email thanking me for responding to the ad

"Thank you for that. I hate it when people are trying to take advantage, as obviously you do. We have to stand up for ourselves - so good for you!!"


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