Sunday, September 7

Random story with no point: the unidentified bug

When I growing up I was a pretty odd little ball. Oh no it's true. Not in a creepy Dakota Fanning sort of way, but more like I didn't read Anne of Green Gables or have a coin collection or have tea parties or want to ride horses. I'm terrified of horses, and even ponies. I had Japanese tea parties and tried to ski with wrapping paper rolls, took Commander Keen very seriously, and listened to Ace of Base but only while walking in the space between apartment buildings.

Anyway, on to the story with no point.

If you can imagine my childhood room (I say room in the singular when really I had like 3.. so one of my childhood rooms) it had a window with a pull down blind, a wicker bed, a real traffic cone/nightlight, a red Sony ghetto blaster where I'd only listen to a Bill Cosby comedy tape (but only when my parents went out) and really faded floral wallpaper. Anyway! So keep imagining this, if you can possibly bare the idea, all this plus some teen dream posters mixed in with Ninja Turtles and even a huge 20x20 puzzle poster of New Kids on the Block... where Jordan was inappropriately unbuttoning his jeans. Very scandalous, Mom!

Well one day, possibly while I was listening to the hit single The Sign on my cool new portable CD player that just came out, I was walking between apartment buildings and I saw a weird bug. I ran and told my Dad to come see it, it was so freaking weird! My Dad had no idea what it was and encouraged me to catch it and look it up. So, that's what I did. This was before the internet though so all I had was Encarta, and Encarta shockingly didn't know what it was either. I managed somehow to bring myself to come close enough to it to put it in one of those tiny coffee crystal jars. It had a red lid - if you want to keep visualizing this. I poked holes in it, put a leaf in it to eat, and asked everyone what they thought it was. Nobody knew and now I didn't know what to do with it! I couldn't let it go, like my Dad suggested, for fear it would be out there and knows where I live so I might run into it again. Since I could not immediately decide what to do with it, I placed the jar in my room behind the pulled down blind on my window. It basically stayed there, as I grew more and more afraid of it, and I'm not even sure when it died because I simply would not even peek back there. Time passed and I was now too deathly terrified of the jar behind the blind to do anything with it. When I'd go to sleep I would have waking nightmares that the dead freak bug was mad at me and out for supernatural revenge! The window sill became it's burial place and, in this narrative, I suppose that would make me the girl who has to walk past the cemetery everyday on her way home from school.

That bug in the jar stayed there for what seemed like a year at least.. a freaking year. I don't remember what happened, but it's pretty likely I ended up confessing the nightmare that was my life and had my Mom or Dad finally throw it away for me. All I remember was it was a huge relief when it was gone!

I'm sure the whole thing is an analogy for something else but hell if I know what that is. I kinda just want to play Commander Keen right now, anyone else in?


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