Friday, February 29

Leap Day is the best day!

I figured I would post the search of the week on this glorious 29th day of February! Let's see.. it's snowing like crazy outside, as of this morning I realize I probably have pneumonia and I got shafted on a payment because someone else is sick. It's ok though because tomorrow I get to have a root canal at 9am. What a glorious day! Haha.

I cannot tell you how much last night truly sucked. I thought I had a chest cold for the past 2 days until I fell asleep at 9pm and had massive chills and sweats all night. Chills are my most hated of all the sicks (Don't worry, puking, you will always be my number 1!) I remember one time I had the worst chills in the universe, I woke up thinking "should I die shivering in bed or die on my way to getting a sweater?" It's as if the cold was literally in my skin and I had no chance of ever getting warm again, however I decrepitly crawled around my room to find some sweaters and socks and extra pants. Anyway that's how last night was, so that memory was awesome. I don't recommend it, that's for sure.



Our search of the week is: asian girl hacked from photobucket flickr post

I don't know what this is about but that's terrible. I attempted to find a back-story here and all I came across was this chick who broke up with her boyfriend via facebook status, bragged about it on Digg, then got hacked into for basically being a stone cold bitch .. yanno. Interesting yes but she isn't asian so I don't care!

Really though, what a bitch.

Monday, February 25

My Open Letter to people who sell furniture on Craigslist

Dear So-and-So,

I see that you are selling your furniture on this popular website here. First of all I'd like to say thanks for not posting in the personals section and therefore not being a total weirdo.  Maybe.  I am someone who has a bit of experience selling/buying on Craigslist, but more than that I have tons of experience just checking out ads.  I'm a curious girl, I am.  So anyway I'd really like to help you out with selling your furniture so here is a little list of things I think you should know.

  1. Don't bother selling your "mint" 1984 Bedroom Set... just throw it away, post it in the free section or give away brownies to the next person who owns a van and can pick it up.  
  2. If it's a particularly stunning set then go crazy and ask for $100.  I do not know what land you bought your laminate, mostly mirrored, painted to "look like marble" set but my guess is the store vanished into a cloud of smoke the minute you walked out with this furniture.  
  3. People generally like dark wood, so if yours isn't why don't you invest in refinishing it or adjust the price.  That goes the same for designer chairs, couches, etc.  You're on Craigslist now you fancy ass!  Way to be a moron and pay $1300 for a chair, I bet you won't make that mistake again.
  4. In the future everyone, please, stop buying things that are all mirrored.   I don't care how cool you are, or hot you are, you never need to see yourself everywhere you turn.  Do you really enjoy fingerprints everywhere?  I don't need my bedroom looking like a future crime scene.
  5. Always tell the buyer the exact condition before they come to pick this up.  People don't really like surprises like a giant scratch or dent somewhere.   I mean, I do, but most people don't!  And since it's for furniture you really waste their time; they probably borrowed someone's van or truck for this... they think about that when low-balling you after seeing the damage, trust me.
  6. For buyers, this is furniture, not tickets to see Jimmy Buffet... don't offer barter items like food stamps, a rusty truck with a billion miles on it, or coupons for KFC.  You'd think it'd sweeten the deal but all it really does is make people want to throw their stuff in the streets rather than sell it to you.
  7. If you want someone to deliver furniture be prepared to get laughed at, hung up on, or pay them a lot of money.  When you buy things I'd prepare myself to go to that location as I would if I went to an actual store.  Only a store charges me full prices on everything!  Can you believe it?
  8. Lastly, using the words Antique or Vintage we all think just means old.  Sell those things at flea markets, or at the very least don't try and add value to that... unless your house is a museum I am not paying extra for something "enjoyed" for many generations.  If I had something Antique like that I'd call myself Indianna Jones and leave it all to obscure family members in my will.

With Love and Frustration,
Ann



That last idea sounds pretty sweet.. I think more people should leave things to their loved ones in some sort of dangerous treasure hunt.  Dangerous as in it's a stupid idea, but not so much as they'd actually die trying to get my dining room furniture.   More like its hidden in a cave full of smelly moss and crabs, or hidden somewhere that finding it has something to do with the tides.  Wait, I've said too much....


It's also good to know nobody who reads this journal watches Lost.  Great information to have.  You'd think that would stop me from posting about it wouldn't you... but you'd be wrong!  

Saturday, February 23

Search of the Week



This week's winner is: 
CHEAP DIAMOND BELTS.  
All in capitals, just like that.  I suppose it was an emergency search, so let me direct that person to the nearest Claire's store asap.  I'm willing to help though so I can offer you my BeDazzler that is currently under my stairs.  My imagination has convinced me there is a Lord of the Rings sized spider in there who makes ticking sounds, and I already braved it once to get xmas decorations. You can have the 'Dazzler for free if you're willing to go in there and get it.  IT'S AN EMERGENCY AFTER ALL.



So you'd think since I have given up TV for good that there are no shows I keep up with.  You would be wrong though, I do, though I torrent only 4 shows.  Lost, Celebrity Apprentice, House and (when it comes back) Journeyman.  For anyone who watches any of those, good for you, and also HOLY SHIT Lost is the shit this year, am I right?  Now, I don't see any of these shows until the day after they air, so, I have no way of spoiling anything for you.  That said, does anyone want to speculate with me who the 5th and 6th person is in this ominous Oceanic Six?



Here's what I have so far in my reasoning:  
  1. We already know Sayid, Kate, Jack and Hurley got off the island.
  2.  The 5th and 6th can only be people from the manifest, so Juliet wouldn't count even if she did get off, neither would Desmond or of course any of those boat people.
  3.  Kate has Aaron (wtf???) sooo it's safe to say Claire does not leave the island because she would never give Aaron to anyone otherwise.  I don't see any likely outcome other than she probably dies, which is another reason why Kate is passing this baby off as her own.  
  4. Sayid, who is apparently working with Ben in the future, may or may not have been included in The Six because: no one has recognized him yet, and he was working undercover.  Also he was on the disappearing helicopter, if it ever makes it to the boat I don't know, but obviously the island has some sort of time travel/suspension ability (just a theory) so it is very possible might have not been counted in the rescue at all.  
  5. John would never leave the island.
  6. The Korean couple would be 5th and 6th.  If my theory about Sayid is true, then one more person might be included, if not then either both Jin and Sun got off, or just one, unlikely that neither got off.
  7. Sawyer may also be a member of The Six.  He could have left with Kate, or stayed with John.  Both and equal chance I'd say.  He wasn't at Kate's trial though, but that could be because of his past.  Who friggin knows.  Though I thought Jack alluded to Kate marrying Sawyer in the super-future (of the season 2 finale).  I could be wrong about that.
  8. Can't forget about Michael, though he may have died, especially if Walt was seen on the island (again, and I don't know what the hell is up with that).  Though if Michael was part of The Six then people would have already known there were survivors a lot earlier, but they didn't.  Unlikely but still counted. 
  9. Unlikely but one or two of the unknown extra survivors could be on the list, just to SCREW us all.. that's what Lost likes to do! 
  10. It might be Aaron, he wasn't on the manifest, but he's still a survivor OF someone who was.

Can I just say I hate this show sometimes and its perpetual mystery box questions! If anyone else saw J.J. Abrams talk at TED, you'll know what I mean... if you didn't then you should click the link.

Alright so if you watch the show and think I am missing something feel free to comment.  If you don't watch the show this whole thing probably pissed you off and you're not even reading this.  Conclusion.. the candidates are: Jin, Sun, Aaron, Sawyer, a random person nobody cares about or Michael.  This is more important than Barack/Clinton, ok.  For the love of god I need to know who else gets off the island, HOW and why.

While we're at it.... so in the beginning the fortune teller told Claire only she can raise Aaron, then sent them on a doomed flight.   Now we know Claire isn't! ugly Chanel-purse-carrying Kate in the future is.  That leads me to believe Aaron will do something especially terrible if a psychic tried to kill them.  Not Global Warming terrible, but Hitler terrible.  So what do you think is going to happen now? Why would Claire give him to Kate if she knew only she is supposed to raise him?  Do you think Kate did something to Claire?  Unlikely, unless Ben revealed something, but if so why isn't anyone else doing anything about it?  Why did Kate tell Jack he has to see Aaron, what the hell happened there that would make it important for anyone to see Aaron?  Do you think Claire gave him up willingly because Aaron was born on the island and would be hunted down for tests if they found out?  Or do you think this is why a boozed up super-future Jack begged Kate to go back to the island, and said it was a mistake to leave?  I consider this problem to be on par with who the hell is Ben?!!!  Ideas welcome, yanno, if anyone actually feels like having a discussion instead of just inter-stalking me ;)

Tuesday, February 19

Bad News: I killed something again

The living holiday tree is no longer living.  I suspected it stopped living a few weeks ago when we'd lift it up to put water in it and it smelled like someone crapped their pants.  I just assumed someone may have crapped their pants... but now it is overwhelmingly obvious that if it smells like someone craps their pants every time I go near the tree then the tree is probably dead/dying.  I'm no plant expert but I also don't think it's "good" if the branches are all pointing down.. making kind of a frowny face. To make sure I googled my tree smells weird and there were actually quite a lot of responses to pick from.  The best source was some kind of Christmas Tree Association?  While mine was a potted plant and the other examples were for actual cut Christmas trees, it was still similar enough that I realize the results are the same:  I killed it.  I over-watered it or I guess nature hates me and it committed plant suicide by refusing to drink and letting the water stagnate and grow bacteria.  That or it was the fucking sparkles embedded into it when I bought it.  I was hoping it would live until the ground thaws and I could plant it in the backyard, but I guess the thought of an entire lifetime of having to live in my backyard was too sad for the tree.  It was too sparkly to live just an ordinary life.


I had a really great video to put up here that Samantha took of Andrea getting drunk after we went snowboarding, but apparently Facebook doesn't let you share!  In it's place is the second best video I have seen this week.



Saturday, February 16

Search of the Week


Warning! This week's winner is highly disturbing: 
flickr woman fu@*&$*ing dogs????






Wtf-o-rama.  Honestly these searches are beginning to creep me out.. which they always end up doing whenever I pay attention to them.  I literally don't know how anyone would end up at my site from some of this stuff.  Aside from this week's "as good as it gets reaction" search of course.  I can see how that one would but let me quickly field that query .. the reaction was pretty good!  So I think you are safe to rent that 1997 release.  I know the blockbuster fees are killing you, but sometimes you can just take a CHANCE.  Back to what I was saying though, one search this week I don't even want to repeat!..  let alone crown the winner, lest that person make their way back here.  It has something to do with little cartoon boys and a word that rhymes with tape.  Someone should start marketing "blog sanitizer" because I would totally buy some right now.


I think the word I am looking for is ANYWAYS uhh, oh right, I'm really loving movie soundtracks these days!  I felt I needed to emphasize that.  Juno and Into the Wild make me really happy .  Clearly I am going to have to start listening to music again.  For real because I kind of stopped doing that for a long while.

One of the blogs I read regularly Violent Acres is having a Birthday Charity Contest this month.   I thought that was a great idea!  Sure I was disappointed people voted for the prize to be a photo of the controversial author, V, but if it's going to charity then I suppose whatever! For the record though, who the flickr picks seeing a picture of an anonymous blogger rather than $500 real dollars???  A world-class idiot, that's who.  I can't think of any picture that is worth that much money to me.  I suppose it just proves how useless people are when they are curious about something.  That leads me to my real topic.  I took the charity thing seriously since that’s what it’s all about and did some research at charitynavigator.org.  Apparently quite a few popular charities have founders, presidents, director or CEO.. whatever they want to call themselves.. who actually get compensated! I find this disheartening.  Sure, there are program costs and administrative.. but an actual salary?  An expense account?

I was about to nominate the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinsons Research when I saw that the CEO made $340,534 and the actual charity grossed $8 grand for the year. Pretty expensive for all that “awareness” they provide. Even still I still think it’s a good cause so I nominated that for consideration, and also the Hole in the Wall Gang Summer Camp which helps children with cancer and other life-threatening illnesses.


So if you feel like being part of the contest, or just feeling mighty nice, I urge anyone to get involved!

Thursday, February 14

V-day? but vagina day isn't for another 6 weeks!

My title is courtesy of Andrea's amazing facebook wall comments.  Today was somehow an insanely productive day.  I feel good about that.  I see my little business moving up and up.  It's fulfilling to offer something that makes a real difference in people's lives, as opposed to, I dunno, selling Hot Dogs.

That said I had a really hilarious moment on Tuesday where a 4.5 year old called me Mommy by accident.  She realized what she said and started laughing, and so did I, since all I could think of is that episode of the Simpsons where Ralph calls Miss Hoover Mommy and then eats a worm.  I'd have referenced it for her if she'd know what the hell I was talking about.  So we literally both laughed about that for a good 10 mins.  It would have been just 5 mins but halfway she reminded me "it's funny because I called you Mommy, and you're Miss Ann".  Haha, ah yes, that's why!  

Really, I try not to laugh at the children, I hear it's not good for them blah blah.  But I have been holding on to this one for a while, since a few weeks after a 3.5 year old told me she was "high".. consider it a valentines present to you.


Ann - hey nice jumping, are you guys supposed to be frogs?
3.5 yr old - yep, ribbit ribbit, I'm high!
Ann - ...yes.  well keep it up then.
3.5 yr old - ribbit! look I'm so high
Ann - uh huh you're very good at that.
3.5 yr old - I'm the highest girl in the world!
Ann - ..... looks like it

I had to leave after that.


As for tonight I hope everyone has a great time, though for the record I think Valentines Day is really silly.  If you're a nice girl you will give a guy a break trying to basically say I care about you and just be happy he's nice to you everyday, like me :)  Unless he's an asshole everyday, in which case Valentines would be a great opportunity for you lol.  Anyways, I'm most likely going to be enjoying some take out or pizza with my skittles and my guy, which would be great.... though I may stop by starbucks to pick up a little Valentines thermos for Sean since he needed one anyway.  Hey maybe he'll get me one too, or an espresso brownie ;)  I've had a great day, after all.

Tuesday, February 12

Supertramp... Superapple

"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun."
— Chris McCandless



I really enjoyed watching Into the Wild recently, although it's not a new movie.  I wish more that I had read it, since the story was so interesting, and I couldn't help but love the real life character of Chris McCandless.  Now, I did not know anything about this story, most importantly that (major spoiler coming right now....) he died in the end.  I don't think anyone can read this book or watch the movie without being fascinated with it, perhaps because you identify with him or because you don't, and really need to learn more about him.  I did that, and I have to say I was honestly unnerved at the reaction some had about his life/death.  That 99% of Alaskans feel like he was stupid, disrespectful of nature, inconsiderate and shouldn't be admired in any way.  Sure, he read maybe a little too much Thoreau and not enough books about how to live in the wild, that's obvious... BUT to act on your idealism is romantic regardless if foolish or in this case arguably suicidal.  I just simply find it unfortunate that things turned out that way for him, he could have really accomplished so much if he had survived his Great Alaskan Adventure, and I'd like to hear more stories where others have.  So no I don't believe comments on his not surviving are relevant if they are made from someone's living-room computer, having not accomplished one goddamn hard thing to do in their lifetime.  That or they never really had any ambition or desire to accomplish anything with themselves past get a job or get married.  How fulfilling!

Life the way it is today, too many kids (yeah I'm likely still somewhat of a KID) don't have any defining right of passage as there have been in so many cultures in the past.  I think it leaves us all looking aimlessly for a singular moment in time to point at, as if in their own life's map or constellation, where they realized adulthood.  So Chris McCandless wanted this, he had ideals about this, referring to it as the climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude his spiritual pilgrimage.  And he was a kid.  I remarked during the movie that if I were him, I would have marched my ass to Mountain Equipment Co-Op and spent all my money before ANY pilgrimage... but that is looking for sense in the otherwise senseless need and want to challenge yourself absolutely.  I think the only foolish thing about this was this bright young man giving himself far too many handicaps, which I think we all do to ourselves in some capacity, somehow.

Saturday, February 9

Search of the Week


This week's winner: the lovely person who google'd is Ray Romano cheap?


What an excellent question, I am sure you were disappointed to end up here.  I can only assume, based on absolutely no information about him, that he really is as cheap as they come and tips people with actual moron tips like "here's a tip for you, I'm 50 and I wear a digital watch, how much money do you really think I have????" or "Yeah thanks for bringing me luke-warm coffee and no sweetener, that was pretty difficult!  your tip is me not killing you right now" -- FYI you should know I get all my stereotypes about life from Charles Dickens' 1893 novel A Christmas Carol.  




First and second runners up: get more aids ; asian wife: searched for SIX different times!  

Funny since I thought even a little aids was more than enough aids.  I guess some people would like to know where they can get more.  Good luck to them, I say!  Get as much aids as you can carry home with you.  Asian wives, too.  The more the better!





I've been horribly sick the past week so that sucks.  The cold, ya that sucks too.  The new movie complex right by my house is awesome though.. we finally went last night.  Let's just say you know you are living in the future when your local movie theater has a VIP section, a bar lounge, and a bowling alley.

Monday, February 4

Charming



Saturday was a great day, very nice weather, heavy snow though, but shockingly I didn't hurt myself too badly!  Just one fall at the bottom I could have done without.  By the way, who goes snowboarding and sits 2/5ths down the hill and chats on their cell phone?  Just a question...  !  What did you seriously have to talk about??  And why didn't I run into her?


I think we're all agreed to make this a regular thing as long as the weather holds out, for anyone who dares to come with.  My dad seemed to think he would be a double black-diamond-belt snowboarding ninja. I might have to insist he comes next time, then! Talk is cheap, yes, we all know this. Let's see it! ;)





Sad blog news. It looks like one of my favourite blogs has been baleeted, possibly forever!  If you got a chance to read it yourself you will know that John Mayer's blog was totally awesome.  I enjoyed reading his blurbs quite a bit since he is very funny and very smart.  At any rate, it made me wish we were friends, and it deserved a mention now that it is gone.  Let's move on to his successor on my blog roll list:  Things I've Bought That I Love.  A cute and funny little blog by Mindy Ephron, one of the actors/writers from The Office.  I will admit that women would probably appreciate this blog a lot more than men, but I think there is something for everyone so feel free to check it out without thinking I sent you somewhere weird.
With that said, I had my very first "man, I wish Mindy wrote a review about this" moment.  I was doing my favourite Sunday morning activity... a little virtu-window shopping, and I ran into a bunch of totally unbelievable bracelets from this crazy lady who runs a website called So-Charmed.









Naturally, the last one is probably the only one I would actually buy, if I had the coin she is asking for these gems (which I don't, I just got my hair cut OK, I'm far from indulging myself in fabulous bracelets!).  I am tempted though, since the more I looked through them and read their little stories, the more I kinda wanted one.  She naturally does custom bracelets and I couldn't help but wonder what I'd like mine to look like.  I think it was the pink enamel chain and pixy dust in the "momentarily, she was transformed" bracelet that got me.  It reminded me of something I had as a kid, and of course in her other custom pieces she basically challenges you to try and imagine the best little memories you have to put on the thing that would just make you happy looking at it.  

So I came up with that pink chain and then the crazy lady got to me!  Yes, suddenly, I knew that if it existed my bracelet should have a tiny replica of a glossy candy music flute.  Specifically in peach/orange.  Does anyone else remember those???  You have to.  It should also have something watermelon on it to remind me of this 80s lip balm I had called Kissing Koolers.  It was all watermelon marble and AWESOME.  


Sweet Jesus, I found it!  
Someone from Jamaica, NY is selling 20 of them on eBay.  
Goddamn you, international shipping!!



Anyhow, now all I can think about is what other stuff I would put on my magic bracelet!  And also, what would other people put on theirs??  What would I buy for friends?  Great.  Sigh, So-Charmed, you are absolutely NUTS and stupid expensive ....but I kinda dig that about you.

Saturday, February 2

Search of the Week

Now, there was a particularly priceless search earlier this week that seemed like poetry BUT I had forgotten to save it.  Our rules are exactly like Miss America, if the winner can't fulfill their obligations as Search of the Week then the first runner up takes their place.  Therefore the winner is: babytalk august 2006.

Apparently in 2006 there was a lot of babytalk, particularly in august.  I had no idea!  Isn't it good to be informed?  Babytalk is back on the rise, my friends, look out for it in 2008!






In other news I finally went and got my hair cut last night.  It looks great, and trust me, I know a bad haircut when I see it and this is the opposite of that.  I am pretty happy since it's been a long time and I needed one, but as usual, I never go.  Like the dentist, which I also went to the night before (and I am feeling much better about that now as well).  What a satisfying feeling to actually start doing things for yourself lol.  I think I will stick to getting my hair cut at this new place since it was basically down my street AND full service..... she even put my coat on for me!  How much do you tip someone after that??  Just a question.  I'm from Hamilton, after all, I don't know these things.


I took a crappy pic for my step-mom who, after reading my facebook status about my sexy new hair, she wanted to see it!  It is much sexier in person with all the wind blowing in it and everything ;) of course.



While I had the camera out, Sean and I decided to have some fun.  This is our role reversal pic.  AKA Sean's interpretation of me, and mine of HIM.  Hahaha.



It's our new favourite.



We're all off snowboarding again this morning.  Wish me luck!  No seriously, go ahead and say good luck out loud please, I am probably falling on my ass this very moment.  Thank you :)
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