Tuesday, February 24

How yellow didn't get it's groove back

So lately we have taken up another painting project.  Better known as the "cover up that totally ugly mustard colour that we thought was fine at first and now makes me angry-sad" project.  I mean literally it covers the whole kitchen, diningroom and hallway in what could be the colour of babypoop after too many ripe banana pies.  Who in gods name thought that colour was a good idea?  The kind of person who would feed a baby pies: a moron.  Anyway so my cutest kitchen ever is being done some justice finally with this colour

Minus the nautical stuff and two pottery barn kids looking like they're co-operating while playing together instead of trying to kill the other one and claim his bed.  I mean other than those differences, it's basically the same room, but a kitchen.

It's funny how one minute something can be ok and the next you hate it with your whole being.  Yellows frequently do that to me. In fact there is a particularly hated yellow truck I see everyday, everywhere I go, which was OK at first because obviously I have seen stupid yellow cars before, but now I want to take up fake-smoking just so I can flick lit cigarettes at it.  I imagine one day the owner comes out and demands to know if those are MY cigarettes ruining his gosh-darn-lovely paint job, and I will say "why no.. I don't even smoke!  it's a disgusting habit.  my sister DIED of cigarettes, you bastard" and then I can light and flick another cigarette at it, which will movie-burst-into-flames just like in How Stella Got Her Groove Back.

How rightously fantastic would that be if the world would just make a few exceptions in what was technically considered 'arson' so I can live out my fantasy of being a crazy black lady.  God.  I am so tired of hearing The People vs. How Ann-Marie Got Her Groove Back, I can't even tell you.  The people need to stop drinking their H8terade and let me be ME!  You can't hold my Groove down.  Another thing I don't get?  I watched(a commercial for) Prison Break once, it looked like a bunch of attractive people, but y'all I totally went to prison once and I was SERIOUSLY the CUTEST one there!


Brian said...

uhhhh, hai ladi ur crazee. :|

for serious.

amber said...

oh crap, that wasn't brian, that was me..lol. but you could probably tell.

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