Thursday, June 18

90s fad, hero to babies

Apparently hypercolour can save your baby's life.  Oh yeah, it's real.

I know that putting my baby in a heat-seeking onesie is far better at diagnosing my baby than holding them, or paying attention to see if their behavior is off like I care.  I'm also seriously impressed that "white ain't right" is the super helpful signal that my baby has been dead for hours because to my knowledge when a person stops breathing they take a little while to be stone cold.  You get your money's worth right there!  Can't I pay an extra $5 or so to put some kind of alarm on one of them in case I'm not staying up all night to check my mood colour baby while they sleep?  All I am picturing are frantic parents screaming "check the colour legend!!" into the night because oh dear Jesus what does green mean again???

Why did nobody tell this guy of the invention that already exists called a self-adhesive temperature strip, where you just put a sticky film over the kids forehead and it tells you if they have a fever?

Hypercolour onesie fails.  I review life, by the way.. I just got my license to do that yesterday.

1 Comment:

Benjamin said...


Is it weird that I want one of these in adult XXL? Made of velvet. I should contact the manufacturer.

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