Saturday, November 21

Smarter than what?




After a day of shopping we had an encounter on the way home with a 70 year old woman who not only talked a lot (this is how I know she was 70) and dressed weirdly, but surprised me by being the first elderly lady to attempt to be super hip at the same time. Here's some of the key phrases to pick up the hipness and general "of this generation"ness she had:

  • use of the word Cool
  • mentioned Mac computers as "the best"
  • was wearing coordinating pink and red all the way to her socks
  • HIGHLIGHT - in fact had pink sketcher sneakers on
  • and a red beret
  • went on about running a marathon (although she usually just does half-marathons) at least 3x
  • praised new parent family member for using cloth diapers and organic stuff
  • let everyone know she has a leopard AND zebra print purse - is into the animal prints
  • would only refer to Toronto as T.O. (tee oh) a number of times

Then out of nowhere she asks "Are Syrian's and Lebanese people close to one another?" (someone answers her) and I swear to God she just goes ......pause..... "They say they're smarter than JEWS!!"

Ladies and gentleman, I was truly tired and only mildly enjoying having to hear this lady chatter on, but in that moment I nearly lost my shit laughing that actual tears formed from the effort it took to stifle it. It was the longest 5 mins ever until I actually gained some composure and of course I couldn't EVEN look at Sean.

Dear god though, was that awesome.

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